When It's NOT Okay To Be Cheap

Cheap is one thing, miserly is a whole ’nother. Yes, it’s true that the dictionary does not see this distinction, but I do. While I will proudly reclaim “cheap” from the trash heap, I do not want to encourage the meanness that miserly implies, at least to me. “Miserly” implies the frugality is not from necessity or thoughtfulness, without regard to the suffering it will create.

So here is my list of when it is definitely NOT okay to be “cheap” (or rather, miserly):

1. Tips. Waiters and waitresses make a horrible hourly salary, so they depend on the tips. I've heard people argue that the tips are bonus, and shouldn't be mandatory (as a reason for not leaving one). Some people will be overly demanding or have unattainably high expectation from the wait-staff, simply to get out of paying the tip. These are mean-spirited strategies for getting out of paying a tip that affect the life of another human being, someone with bills and kids and responsibilities. It is a luxury that you get the final say on how much the service was worth, and by all means, if it was exceptionally bad, vote with the tip. But put yourself in your server's shoes, and if you could do no better, think of how you would like to be compensated. Restaurants SHOULD charge more and just pay their waitstaff. I wish they would.

2. Wages. If you find yourself in the position of paying someone for work they've done, do not try to get the work done for less than it's worth. Try to keep in mind that the money you pay helps support a real person. If you run a retail business, of course you must look at the profits, but increasing them on the backs of those who helped make that happen is a cruel way to grow a business.

3. Stuff. When buying something from one store instead of another, consider why it is cheaper. Are they paying people a living wage? Was it manufactured with prison/slave labor? Is there a way to buy a similar product for a higher price that doesn't promote cruelty? Did it take massive resources to produce? Was it shipped from way far away?

4. Disposable Stuff. Choosing poorly-crafted items because they are cheap and can easily replaced is short-sighted, and is an unsustainable (and ultimately more costly) method of saving. By investing in well-made, long-term tools, you save yourself the constant headache of endlessly replacing.

If your frugality does harm, rather than good, it is not acceptable frugality. Consider the environmental impact, the health impact, and mostly, the human impact, then make the choices that will leave you feeling good about being cheap.